Thursday, February 6, 2014

t3 - the chore rules



Let me take this moment to brag on my husband. He’s a great helper around the house. If I ever need him to do something, he won’t hesitate to do it. And, he even does a lot of things on his own. I find he's the biggest help right around test time {unloading the dishwasher sounds fun when you've been beating anatomy terms into your head for the past eight hours}.

If you had asked me eight months ago {have we really been married eight months???} how much help Daniel would be, I probably would have laughed. The garbage dump that was his room and the mountain of laundry in his closet during college gave me plenty of evidence otherwise.

That being said, he's proved me wrong.

And the strangest part? We don’t really have "assigned" chores.

I don’t always do the laundry, and Daniel doesn’t always take out the trash. Daniel doesn’t always vacuum the floor, and I don’t always clean the toilet. We take turns and we do what needs to get done.

However, I do have a couple of rules that I like to enforce that makes everything a little bit more “fair.”


Rule #1 If you don’t cook, you clean.

I started instilling this rule back in college, and I am so grateful I did. Nothing makes me dread cooking more than knowing there is a pile of dishes waiting for me to clean up afterwards. So this way, I have no inhibitions coming straight home from work to cook up some grub. And, when Daniel decides to relieve me of the responsibility and unleash his cooking abilities with a big pot of macaroni and cheese or a couple bowls of cereal, I don’t mind cleaning up after him a bit.


Rule #2 The last one out of bed makes it.

Honestly, it took forever for this rule to catch on. Unless something crazy happens, I’m always the first one out of bed, which means Mr. I-thrash-around-in-my-sleep-so-much-all-the-sheets-end-up-on-the-floor is left to put it back together again. Now that there could be a house showing any day of the week, we always have to make the bed before we leave. I couldn’t be happier about it, either.


Rule #3 No dishes in the sink, no dishes in the living room.

This is actually partly my husband’s rule. He absolutely hates it when I leave dishes in the sink. But, if I’m running out the door, it only makes sense to throw my cereal bowl in the sink real fast, right? On the other hand, it’s completely acceptable to leave your used dishes all over the living room. I once watched a used yogurt bowl sit on the couch {on the couch!!!} for an entire week. My stubborn side refused to pick up after him, but after seven days, I realized I was the only one suffering.


What about you? Does your house have any {chore} rules to live by?


21 comments:

  1. We share the "cooks don't clean" rule and I l.o.v.e. it. These are some great ground rules. I think it's super important for couples to share the load around the house. It's really interesting to think of the chore habits that we have built! :)

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  2. I make my dog pick up her toys. Yup. She has a toy box and before bed I point at it and say 'toy return' and she picks up the loose toys and they go back in the box and she gets treats. Because I'm OCD. Otherwise, I live alone so no rules! When John's over, I actually tell him to leave dishes in the sink because he won't load the dishwasher how I like it :)

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  3. I grew up with the "cooks don't clean" rule and that definitely spilled over into our marriage. It's nice now but I think it will be ESPECIALLY nice when we have kids!

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  4. These are great rules! Nate and I don't have specific chores either (other than vaccuming. HE vaccums. I hate vaccuming) I think these rules would be great to implement, though.

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  5. we don't have "assigned" duties either, we just do whatever needs to be done. so far, it's worked great!
    i like the "if you cook, you don't clean" rule and may just have to institute that! :)

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  6. I do most of the household things just because I like it all done a certain way. Pete usually takes out the garbage though, and he's great at doing the dishes!

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  7. 8 months?! i wonder if we got married the same day?? and also - i definitely agree with your household chores- we never really made them, but we settled into a similar "i cook - you do dishes" routine :)

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  8. The no dishes in the sink makes a HUGE difference!

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  9. There are definitely exceptions when it comes to the clean-up rule - especially around test time. I don't think it would be fair of me to make him clean up when he's been studying every waking hour of his day. And, that's awesome that you hate dishes in the sink. I wish I hated it more. But sometimes I'd rather just let them sit there!

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  10. I think we spent a whole premarital counseling session talking about how we would handle chores. Our pastor said over and over how important it was that we share the load so we don't come become bitter toward each other. But, it's definitely interesting to see what routines we've settled into.

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  11. Wow, that's great - and she is one smart dog! Daniel is actually more particular about the dishwasher than I am. He always makes it more "efficient," which is completely fine with me!

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  12. Hahaha - those were Daniel's words EXACTLY. When he's washing dishes after dinner, he says its the only time he thinks about wanting kids {at this point in our marriage}.

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  13. Thank you! Ever since I posted this, Daniel has been trying to change the rules. "How about the first one INTO bed has to make the bed?" I'm not big on vacuums either - especially if they're bulky.

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  14. I'm glad it's working for you! And, you should definitely instill that rule - especially when you have kids! "You can either help Mommy cook, or help Daddy clean - your choice!"

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  15. Garbage and dishes are both chores I'd rather Daniel do - something about half-eaten food really grosses me out!

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  16. We were married June 8th - you? {Hopefully, I'm doing the math right on that one.} Doesn't cooking feel much less like a burden when you know you don't have to clean up afterward?

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  17. You're definitely right. Unfortunately, it's the one thing I'm laziest about. I normally live by the "work first, play later" mentality, but my only exception is the dishes!

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  18. What a great list! I should come up with some chore rules for our house as well.


    (I feel your pain about the dirty bowl on the couch. I've been there.)

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  19. Yes, you should! Just make sure they aren't too strict. I'm definitely more lenient on these rules when Daniel has a busy week.


    And that's so gross, right? I just don't understand why that is acceptable but it's not acceptable to leave the dish in the sink?

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  20. The only "rule" we really have is regarding dishes: I clean all the "big" stuff like pots and pans. He cleans all the "little" stuff like dishes and silverware. I've tried to get him to jump on board with your rule #1, but I've decided to take what i can get ;)

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  21. Hey, a little help is better than no help at all for sure! And, I totally understand - I choose not to be picky or OCD about the way things are done, simply because I'm just grateful for ANY help.

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